A signed copy of ‘Witchfinder: Dawn of the Demontide’ that is, not an actual signed witchfinder! They’re pretty hard to come by these days, and certainly don’t appreciate being scribbled on! Anyhoo, if you want to enter the comp all you have to do is find me on twitter – I’m ‘WitchfinderBook’ – and tweet me a ‘hello’.

A winner will be selected at random on Friday (30th July). Good luck!

Right, I must get back to work, I’m busy trying to help Jake Harker out of a sticky situation. He’s presently surrounded by 243 hungry vampires and needs to catch a bus… Ooo, cryptic! Oh, and for no particular reason, here’s a picture of Matthew Hopkins, the real-life Witchfinder General – you’ll be meeting him very soon…

If you haven’t seen it yet, be warned: the evidence of this video by Cyriak (via Boing Boing) seems incontrovertible. I can’t decide what’s more horrifying: the giant spider cow, the species’ hitherto unknown ability to turn into a cow puddle then revert Terminator 2 style or the way, at the end, they stand around pretending they didn’t do anything and everything’s perfectly normal.

(shudders)

Previously: Are Owls Monsters?

Readers still looking to get their dragon on after TBM’s own Mark Robson’s majestic Dragon Orb series, look no further: Temeraire, by Naomi Novik, is ace.

It is the time of the Napoleonic Wars. Captain Will Laurence has his career path in the Navy mapped out, but his plans are resoundingly scuppered when a captured French frigate turns out to be carrying a dragon egg: the creature hatches, chooses Laurence as his rider and companion, and a new life in England’s fledgling dragon-based Royal Aerial Corps awaits!

The dragon Temeraire himself is a wonderfully appealing character and the book mixes all sorts of unusual influences into its rich fantasy brew: with notes of C S Forester’s awesome Hornblower series in its nautical action, even some Jane Austen social comedy in there as well as all the top-notch widescreen dragon shenanigans you could possibly want, Temeraire (or His Majesty’s Dragon as it’s known in the US) is charming, thrilling and tremendous fun. Take a leathery wing-tip from me and give it a go: it’s one of the best books I’ve read so far this year.

Sam

I found this on my drawing board this morning!

previous postcard / next postcard

Here’s a small house monster I caught lurking behind my tea cup, and a bit of a nasty start it gave me too. This is a lesson to us all to keep things ship-shape and spick and span, or at least not in direct contravention of statutory hygiene requirements. If you don’t, the bits form themselves into Beings and that’s what you don’t want, although I think this dust and pet hair combo would make a very convincing false beard.

Look at these babies…

My author copies of the Chinese version of Scream Street popped through my letterbox this morning, and I’m absolutely delighted with them!  They look and feel fantastic and – in a completely unexpected move – the publisher has split book 7, Invasion of the Normals, into two volumes!

My plan to eventually dominate the world continues…

Many thanks to my good friend, David ‘The Witch’ Robinson, for posting a link to this book on my Facebook page. I am ordering it immediately.

Here’s the blurb from Amazon:

It’s Shatner VS Shatners!
William Shatner? William Shatner. WILLIAM SHATNER!!! It’s the first ShatnerCon with William Shatner as the guest of honor! But after a failed terrorist attack by Campbellians, a crazy terrorist cult that worships Bruce Campbell, all of the characters ever played by William Shatner are suddenly sucked into our world. Their mission: hunt down and destroy the real William Shatner.

Featuring: Captain Kirk, TJ Hooker, Denny Crane, Rescue 911 Shatner, Singer Shatner, Shakespearean Shatner, Twilight Zone Shatner, Cartoon Kirk, Esperanto Shatner, Priceline Shatner, SNL Shatner, and – of course – William Shatner!

No costumed con-goer will be spared in their wave of destruction, no redshirt will make it out alive, and not even the Klingons will be able to stand up to a deranged Captain Kirk with a lightsaber. But these Shatner-clones are about to learn a hard lesson…that the real William Shatner doesn’t take crap from anybody. Not even himself.

It’s Shatnertastic!

What a concept. I’ll post a review after I’ve read it. Assuming my head doesn’t explode in sheer delight.

After viewing this video I’m not sure. Watch out for the transformation into ‘Evil Owl.’

Thanks to my mate Simon J for sending me the link.

Sam

Next: Are Cows Monsters?

This is Alan Moore.

He’s the author of lots of my favourite stories (including Halo Jones, Swamp Thing, V for Vendetta, Watchmen, Top Ten and The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, to name just a few) and he’s also a bit of a hero to me.

These – as they appear in The Extraordinary Works of Alan Moore, by George Khoury – are Alan Moore’s Five Tips for Would-Be Writers:

ALAN MOORE’S FIVE TIPS FOR WOULD-BE WRITERS

1. Don’t.

2. No, really don’t.

3. DEFINITELY don’t – I mean it.

4. Whatever you might be imagining about a life of writing, it’s not like that.

5. OK, if you’re going to anyway, if you’re going to be a writer of any quality, you will have to commit yourself to writing – which is something that, when you’re young and idealistic, sounds incredibly easy to do, but you should commit yourself to writing almost as if you were some ancient Greek or Egyptian committing yourself to a god.

If you do right by the god, then the god may, at some point in the future, reward you. But if you slack off and don’t do right by your talent or your god, then you are heading for a world of immense and unimaginable pain. If you have a gift that you choose to pursue, then you have to pursue it seriously. Don’t be half-assed about it, but realize what that commitment means.

Committing yourself to writing will mean, to a certain extent, your writing will become the most important part of your life – and that’s a big thing to say. It can have a distancing effect upon other relationships. It can be sometimes quite a solitary life. If you’re committed to writing, you’re going to spend most of your life indoors in a silent, empty room, concentrating on a pen and a piece of paper or their equivalent. Be prepared to take it seriously and be prepared to follow where it takes you, even if that takes you to some very strange places.

This is by no means the most glamorous profession.

Don’t say that I didn’t warn you.

When one of my favourite editors left the publisher I work for a few years ago and I decided to draw this picture as a parting gift. These two critters are Fidget and Quilly (and their pet kitten). Characters that we worked on together for a couple of years. Well, I decided to show them in that ‘relaxed’ end of day mode. You know, when you’ve done with work and you just want to slip into something comfy (steady), step out of character and kick back.

I spend a lot of time creating a world for my characters. Not all of it makes the final story but it helps to get to know them. This is as close as I’ve got to wondering if all story book characters have a life outside of um…well, storybooks. And if they did, what would they do with their time?

Answers on a postcard…